If I have to choose between you and me – I like me better. – Charlaine Harris
Everything We Do
I wanted to be noticed. I wanted to be the best student. I wanted to feel valued by people in society. I wanted to feel accepted.
Even now, I want recognition. I want to be known and loved by people. I am writing this article because I want you to accept my view and complement me for my writing.
Let’s not beat about the bush, I’m not the only one.
Why do you go to the gym?
Why do you want to start your own project?
Why do you wear certain clothes?
Why do you want to volunteer?
Why do you play golf?
Why do you want to do anything you do?
I’ve got a theory: We all want to feel important.
This isn’t a new idea.
One of my favourite books is “How to Win and Influence Friends” written by Dale Carnegie in 1396. In his book, he illustrates that feeling important is one of the greatest of human needs, up there with food, sleep, and sex. He goes on to say that unlike food, sleep and sex, feeling important is not easy to acquire.
Yes, that’s right, it’s encoded in our nervous system.
We all want a fan club. We all want to matter to others. We crave to be appreciated by society. We are motivated by a desire to be great. We want to contribute something to society. We want to feel unique, important, special or needed. We want to leave a legacy, to be heard, to be known.
In essence, we are self-interested human beings.
But I want to make one thing there’s nothing wrong with being selfish.
Let me explain why.
Our selfishness can be used to benefit other people.
It’s all about accepting and leveraging our selfishness to do something important that helps other people.
If we can combine what we love doing in such a way that helps other, then this is great. Finding that intersection is difficult.
I’m primarily writing this blog to improve my writing and build good habits, but if by chance it can help other people with their own life, then that creates a win-win situation.
So a question to ask yourself could be:
How can I find a way to do things I love while simultaneously benefiting others?
I think feeling important and selfishness is good.
It allows us to become our best possible selves, drives continuous improvement.
Thinking about it, maybe our feeling of importance roots back to something even deeper than that. Maybe, just maybe, we all want to be loved.
Thanks for reading!
All the best, Daniel Beaumont, 28th August 2017
About the Author
Hello everyone, I’m Dan – a 28-year-old social entrepreneur and writer from the north of England, living in Bucharest, Romania. I’m currently writing my first book about my 4-year journey around the world seeking wisdom and life-lessons from everyday people I met hitchhiking and Couchsurfing.
I discovered that travel, if approached with the right mindset, can be life-changing, and a trip combining travel, purpose and introspection is a great way to learn, challenge oneself and change for the better. Now my mission in life is to share what I’ve learned to inspire others to embark on their own journey of self-discovery and use travel, entrepreneurship and technology as a means to make the world a better place.
I’m also the founder of Podstel – a vision to help humanity belong and grow by creating a worldwide network of ‘homes’ that bring locals and travellers together to share their stories, passions and skills. The first two Podstels are open and thriving in Bucharest, so if you’re passing through, be sure to come and say hi, or stay the night with us.
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